Bleed and smile
by KarouF300
Summary: Everybody knows that inspector Lestrade needs Sherlock Holmes to solve the most complicated crimes.What happens if,this only time,he actually can't ask for his help,on the edge of losing his job for the trust he lent to him. Solution: recruit a new freak.


**Bleed and smile**

Disclaimer: All cannon characters belong to Arthur Conan Doyle and BBC series.

For chapter one :

**Cannon characters:**

D. Lestrade, mention of Sherlock Holmes

**Rating:**

M

**Warnings:**

Spoilers "A Study in Pink".

* * *

**Chapter one**

**The newborn**

''You wished to meet with me, Harper.''

Lestrade closed the door behind him. Robert Harper was his immediate superior. A fine man with a good long-term activity as a policeman. Also near to his retirement.

''Ah, Lestrade, take a seat. I woke up this morning and I thought about you.''

''Oh, that... flatters me.'' he doubtfully answered.

''You asked, as I recall, for an assistant. Are you still in need of someone?''

''In need? I asked for it three months ago!''

The oldest widely opened his eyes, lowering his head like if he was about to scold a child.

''Yes, I... Like I've said,'' Lestrade tried to restructure, ''I still need an assistant. To finish the endless pile of reports, mainly. And someone that will accompany me on the field to take notes... remembers me useful things.''

''Yes, well, nothing that cannot be done by you.''

''I could. But to be honest, I lack of time.''

''If you were more effective on the field, you could spend more time on the reports yourself.''

Lestrade faked a smile in response to the provocation. He knew his patron was not very proud of his late... mistakes.

''That is why I found you an assistant. A freshly graduate fellow from the best police institution.''

The inspector harshly brushed his right eyebrow, trying to keep his bad mood for him.

''I need someone with experience, not some random student in need of a training.''

''Certainly. Like any new comrade, you will need to show the job. As one of the best students the institution encountered, I would like the keep that newborn here at Scotland yard. A very promising fellow that I can't just throw away to another commissionership.''

''Okay, fine by me. But he should be attached to an officer that carries lesser cases. I can't let an amateur treads the floor of a crime scene...''

''My decision importunes you, mister Lestrade?''

The chief officer and the inspector glared at each other with disdain. Lestrade sighed, clenching his teeth in frustration. He had asked for help, not for additional work.

''He must be very talented and with extraordinary grades to hold your regard.''

''Quite.''

''Only... quite?'' Lestrade raised an eyebrow.

The older man leaned toward the other, like if he was about to tell a secret.

''I've read your late reports about that special case of yours. And I think she exactly is what you need to settle this before it starts to rot.''

''Excuse me... She?''

''Have a problem with that? I did not knew you as a sexist person.''

''No, that is not what I...''

He pulled away like if it was the worst of all the insults.

''I simply don't remember ever having a nice relationship with any of the female officers in Scotland yard.'' he finally added.

The chief put himself at ease.

''That is not a problem. We don't need to wait three months before...''

''Oh, right. You intend to use her and throw her away after the job.''

''I meant, if she's not as useful and competent that she looks to be, we will _nicely _ask her to retire. So, ready to meet with you future colleague?''

''If I must.'' he grumbled. ''How can I contact her?''

Harper cleared his throat and faked a smile. He grabbed his phone and pressed a button.

''You can release her from the cell. And yes, take her to my office. Of course you remove the handcuff!''

He angrily hang up and started to pat his desk, hoping to ease the cold atmosphere... or fill an unwanted silence.

''Why?'' plainly asked Lestrade.

''Had duff up someone.''

''Someone?''

''A bad guy... hopefully.''

''Hopefully?''

''We still are collecting the facts.''

Lestrade outrageously stood up.

''Enough. There is no time left. I will call for Holmes.''

''No you won't. Not this time.''

The chief stopped hammering his desk and harshly gazed at his fellow.

''I'd like you to recall that there is a girl to find before it's too late... and find her alive could actually be wonderful.''

''And you to recall your pathetic demonstration to the last press release. The reputation of Scotland yard has been endangered. Because of your odd thrust toward your so-called friend the soothsayer. If you want to keep your job, you'll do as I say. I am clear enough, inspector?''

Lestrade bitted his inferior lip and closed his eyes.

''Duff up?'' he desperately added.

Knocking were heard.

''Come in!'' grunted the old man.

The door silently opened. A beautiful blond woman appeared, a letter in her smooth hands. The very short skirt showed the elegancy of her slim and delicate legs. And her wide opened cleavage was so... Lestrade painfully lashed his mind and ascended his eyes on her wonderful visage.

''Mister Lestrade, I presume?''

''Eh... yes, it's me, indeed.'' he cutely stammered.

''Nice to meet you. I've heard a lot of... juicy stories about your solved cases.''

''Yes well...'' he mumbled, trying to regain his composure. ''Maybe it is not... very appropriate for a new ''officer'' to dress this way. We never know when we will have to run after a bad guy. If you see what I mean.''

The woman looked surprised and tried to figure out why the inspector was telling her such a thing. She nicely sneered as she understood.

''Oh... but I only am the new secretary. There is a letter for you.'' she ended with a shy smile before leaving.

A hand covering his mouth, the chief tried not to laugh at his stunned colleague.

''Maybe I should have picked her, instead.'' teased the sitting man.

''NO. No... certainly not.''

Then, without any knocking, another woman passed the door.

''I am not gonna run away, you know.'' she wickedly launched to her escort.

The officer shook furiously his head and returned to his tasks. Lestrade raised an eyebrow, scanning the newcomer head to feet. She was modestly dressed of a plain jeans and a green coat with fur on the hood. Her large feet were hided under running shoes for men. Almost as tall as himself and quite built. Long soft curled hairs attached in a high ponytail. Brown... or green eyes. Hard to say. Slim visage and not so pale skin. Wait... did he forgot to comment about her hips and breast? Must been the heavy coat.

''You must be inspector Lestrade.'' she said, offering her hand. ''I heard a lot of... juicy stories about your unsolved cases.''

The inspector did not shake hands and contented himself an outraged gaze to his boss.

''Right, I am not at my very best with greetings, anyway.'' she simply added, clearing her throat. ''My name is Lionelle Beauchamp. Friends call me Lio.''  
''A French accent.'' noticed Lestrade, finally accepting the handshake.

''French-Canadian to be precise. Some people does not stand French accent. So if it bothers you, I can try another.''

''Another...?''

''Now that the presentation are done, what about paying her a little visit of Scotland yard, talking about your case.'' Harper impatiently stroked the greetings.

OoooO

The new colleagues walked accompanied by an awkward silence.

''The cafeteria.'' he said.

''Where the gossips are growing.'' she added.

''Toilets.''

''Great place for a subtitle blowjob.''

''My office.''

''And I thought I might see trophies.''

''Are you always like that?'' Lestrade launched, offended.

''Like what?''

''Detestable.''

''No.''

''No?''

''You asked, I answered. What about explaining the case to me?''

Lestrade wrinkled his eyebrow, mouth moving like a fish. ''Let it go'', he angrily convinced himself. He shook his head. He had no choice to cooperate.

''We are searching for a man who is selling young girls to the black market. That man was working in Normandy before running away from authorities and pursuing his cruel activities here in London. We have no idea about his identity such as our country next door.''

''How does he dumps his merchandise in other countries?''

''_They_** carry** the **girls** by boat and airplane... probably.''

''Using both to confuse policemen like you, I presume. These other countries, they did not noticed anything?''

''We actually intercepted only one girl so far. Others, we don't know where they were sent. They locked the victim into a suitcase. She was under strong anaesthetic and would have open her eyes only six hours later. She was sent to Morocco''

''It takes five hours and twenty minutes to go there from here, isn't?''

Lestrade smiled to himself. What if he was in presence of a girlish version of Holmes. He crossed his fingers.

''Useless information.'' she completed, shaking her head.

''Pardon me?''

''Yes, useless for me. I am not very good with puzzles and links...''

''... Then, what are you here for? I currently am losing my time like an idiot, or am I not?'' angrily shouted Lestrade,

''If it's the only information the police knows about this case, then yes, you are losing your time. So am I.''

Lestrade furiously passed a damp hand onto his tired visage.

''The actual man needs staff to archive his work. We arrested one of them... well we presume we caught one. He was about to take a girl with him. We got information from the criminal concerning another man called Kennedy White. He is the one who hired the one we spoke to.''

''And White is not the man you could seek, by any chance?''

''No, he probably only is an intermediary.''

''What else you've got from the criminal?''

Lestrade looked unpleased, almost shy. He took a deep breath.

''That's all we were able to get.''

''Why? Where is he? I'm sure that with a little of unholy methods we could gain far more from him.''

''He is dead.''

''Oh.''

''He actually killed himself in the middle of the interrogation.''

''Ha, ha! Did he bitted his tongue or what?''

''Bad joke.''

''Don't mind them.''

''We did not noticed that there was poison into is ring. Time we reach him, he was already agonising.''

''Charming. He feared more to be caught alive by his employer then to be caught guilty by the police. What about Kennedy? Not reached him at all?''

''We know everything of him. Where he lives, what are his activities...''

''The problem is?''

''He is a very powerful man into organised crime.''

''Why not arresting him?''

''This is a very complicated matter. Something that you will understand through experience.''

''_Experience_ me then.''

He sighed and stopped walking. They were standing in a lone corridor, only spied by cameras. He let himself leaning on the wall and crossed his feet.

''Kennedy is like a big boss of an industry. If we put him out of the line, the other bosses will try to expropriate his power. That will cause a criminal war which is totally not recommended. By letting him rule his little world, we do not touch the fragile balance of peace between the different gangs.''

''Sounds ratter complicated... I will erased that from my memory tonight. Let's go back to our case.''

'' Erase it... fine.'' eyes rolled. ''If we reach or interrogate Kennedy, all London's criminals will know. If London's criminals know, then our...''

''... man will know that you are getting near of him and will escape to another country before he gets caught.''

''So, now you understand that we need to gain information from him very subtlety.''

''I also understand that the main treat is not about saving the girl, but seizing the man.''

Lestrade clenched his teeth together and responded nothing.

''What kind of man he is?'' she continued, braking the cold moment.

''The busy kind. He is running a couple of bars and prostitutes... sorry, sex workers places around London and adjacent cities. But he always passes his free time in the main establishment. Could almost say that he lives there. The Stallion.''

''Sounds awfully gay.''

''Or awfully beastly.''

''Point taken. So he likes beautiful and hot young women.''

''Never seen without a gal brushing against him. We've tried to send double agents into the lair but no one could enter. There is a metal detector and the bodyguards meticulously scour everyone. Impossible to get in with a weapon, a transmitter or a mike. There is cameras everywhere outside and there is no breakable door.''  
''Fine, fine, I got it. The only way to get in is by the front door. Tell me, once in there, what would have done your double agents? Dancing on metal poles?''

''Very funny.''

Lestrade studied her for a moment. Beauchamp seemed to be a very calm person. But the way she talked was so straight and unconcerned.

''Anyway,'' he finally pursued, ''we need to find another way to reach this man without entering the Stallion.''

''You said he was almost living there. Means that he is sleeping in the establishment and probably have all his doubtful belongings in his quarters.''

''Yes, very probable.''

''Then, outside the Stallion, the only way we could use to get information from him, would be to directly asks questions to the man. Not exactly the best way to be subtitle. No, we need to get in the Stallion. And I am exactly the person you need for this job.''

''Oh! Did you listened to me? I said, no weapon and no mike is allowed.'' aggressively expressed Lestrade, waving his hands before him.

''I don't need those things to do my job.''

''Too dangerous! I would never let an unarmed amateur into this... puerile lair.''

Beauchamp rested her shoulder on the wall next to the dissatisfied inspector.

''You always first suspect the man for a crime. The woman comes after. I am a young woman who comes to the Stallion to make money and gain _pimp _reputation. I am unarmed, lightly clothed, wearing high heels and talks dirty. Who will think I am a cop. None. They will let me in.''

''Do you even realise that the men could...''

''Touch me? Beat me? Rape me? Come on, it could happens anywhere else. In the metro, in a dark street...'' she winced like if his argument was off topic. ''If I get what I want, it's all fine.''

''Oh, I see.'' he suddenly changed the tone of his voice. ''You are the kind of woman who will sell her body to have power and money.''

''A slut?''

''Yes, exactly the word. The kind of people who will do a blowjob to have a promotion.''

''Don't get me wrong there.'' she grumbled with a sulky voice. ''I was talking about consequences and not ways to reach goals. I am up for a doubtful job. If something bad happens I will not cry over it. Mainly because I am prepared to the fact that I can burn myself while playing with fire.''

Lestrade arched an eyebrow, glaring at her with his deep eye like if he was trying to read her minds.

''And no.'' she added, rolling her eyes. ''I will not do a blowjob for a promotion, not even a kiss... not even a dirty talk.''

''Fine, clear enough. But those things could probably happen if you want to get into their lair and meet with the man.''

''It depends on how I play the cards.''

Lestrade straightened and started to walk toward the cafeteria. Surprised by the sudden move, the woman attached her steps to his.

''That's insane... You are insane.'' he pointed her. ''You don't even know before what you are standing.''

''Let me be clear, mister Lestrade. Don't ever ask me do to some paperwork or take important things in note. It's not my expertise area. I'll make countless mistakes and you know...

The inspector launched an annoyed gaze to the newcomer, all his hope vanished.

'' ... mess all the things up. But ask me to be there on the field, there in the middle on the action. I can do anything, anywhere... I'll always find a way to get out or to get in.''

Beauchamp was getting excited, little stars in her dusky eyes.

''When it's dangerous, I'm your man. Well... I could have said ''I'm your woman'', but it feels kind of odd to my ears.''

''Wait...''

''No time to wait. That is what I have been told. Provide me clothes, a makeup girl and a hairdresser... And I am ready to play Sandy's role; the wonderful expensive sex worker that wants to spend the night with the most exciting man of London, mister White.''

Lestrade sighed and stopped walking. He glared, clueless, at his new comrade.

''I can't picture you as a slut.''

''That's wonderful news.'' she smiled.

''Once inside, what do **you** intend to do?''

''Get rapidly to Kennedy by using flatteries.''

''After?''

''Arouse him.''

''Yet again; after?''

''Make sure he does not want to do a threesome. I need to be alone with him.''

''You get to his room. What comes after?''

''I take the information... if information there is, since you are not sure that Kennedy really is linked to the man you seek.''

''No!''

The blocked her the way. He made sure to have deep eye contact.

''I'll tell you what's gonna happen. Kennedy will undress you. If you resist he will use strength or even calls for his men to force you to undress. You will be raped, and throw outside of the lair like a doll of cloth. End of the story. Total flop.''

The visage of the woman did not change. The silence was growing indecent. He broke eye contact and took a deep breath to explain himself properly.

''Look... if you go there, you will be totally defenceless. You can't carry nothing. No mike to call for help. No weapon or...''

''Weapons are not always made of metal or heavy to lift.''

''Right...'' he sarcastically pursued, finally letting her some space. ''Maybe you could carry a plastic fork to defend yourself if the plan fail.''

The woman started to lightly laugh.

''Lestrade, in those kind of situations, women are very powerful. You probably know that yourself since you got married once.''

''How did you... ''

''Internet is a wonderful source of information. Jokes put aside... what about a simple and powerful somniferous for the man I want to rob?''

''Small enough and could easily pass unnoticed, indeed...''

''Precisely. Tomorrow night, on a Friday, will be a great moment to silently sneak in. So... take notes. I will need clothes were I can hide into the swings two plastic tubes of five millimetres of diameter. One filled with crushed somniferous.''

''What about the other?''

''Pet sperm. I don't mind which animal; dog, pig, horse.''

Lestrade's head backed in surprise like a chicken would do.

''I will leave, now, if you don't mind. I am very tired... See you tomorrow.''

''But... wait! Are you not suppose to wait until they solve the case of the man you beat up?''

The woman abruptly stopped her cadence.

''Tell them that I needed to pee and that I escaped by the toilet bowl hole.''

Lestrade took a deep breath. How could he possibly managed to always get himself stuck with strange, deranged, odd people. She harshly sighed and made volte-face.

''What about a visit to the archives department?''

**End of Chapter one**

* * *

_How did you find__ the conversation between __Lestrade and Lionelle?_

_Sorry, my english writting is not perfect._


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